We Must Engage!

Living in the Bible Belt of Texas all my life, I have become accustomed to feel of "leather" around my waist. Not too mention, the brassy belt buckel of pride that says, "Hey,I am a Christian!" Gathering each week with my "posse", the really good cowboys met 3 times, to talk about home on the range, the good book, and how we can correl the "wild mustangs." We watch from the high mountain tops, looking below as they run in herds, amazed by their numbers, their strength, their beauty. But do we run with them...OH NO! That could be dangerous...we could get lost in the stampede. Most times we keep our distance, return to our campsite, huddle around the fire for warmth, talk about whats going on out there in the wild west, and go to bed.

Being in the "wild west", so to speak, I feel a little lost. You see for last 5 years, my whole life revolved around the campsite....church. I worked there, worshiped there, all my friends were somehow connected to the church, it was my social life, work life, and spiritual life. And usually when I did encounter a "wild mustang" I was in the company of other bearers of the belt buckle. Kind of boosts the confidence...now I find myself alone...and wondering where I fit in out on the range. My instinct, only bc its what I have known, is to retreat within the church walls. You know we what do...circle up the wagons and have our own community. Then it strikes me...did Christ hang out in the church all the time. No he was associated with sinners...even ate with them...IN THEIR HOUSES. "Whoah, whaoh...that is a little out there don't you think?" Yes it is for a little baptist girl, but not for God's girl.

I am learning...that it might be better (Now if you are baptist grown cowboy..HOLD onto your saddle for this one!) to go...maybe (hold tight now) even have a glass of wine or go dancing with them, so that I may build a relationship. And by building, and LOVING.....I may one day share Christ with them. Very contraversial among the belt buckles...stirs up the campfire if you will.

Bottom line: There is no impact without contact. We must engage!

"Please Try Again"

These are the words I read on my Dr. Pepper (1 in 6 win) cap. Man you'd think, one in six, those are pretty good odds. And yet, I sure have read alot of "please try again" messages. Makes me wonder if they really do put a winner in every six drinks. Regardlesss, I kind of feel like this is the message for me right now. Nothing seems to say "winner". In fact, the message I feel more times than not is "loser." Now I know that is not a good thought and probably from the enemy himself but seriously can't we hook a girl up with a winning DP. =)

Tonight we went to another small group. All nice people...I just feel on the outside and I get in the car thinking.....will this ever be home? feel like home? can we make it here? financially? will we have a life here? friends? career? Just enough to cause tears to fall and the jeep to pull into the nearest gas station.....for a Dr. Pepper. (No Sonic here) And as I twisted my cap in anticipation that I would be a winner....I was disappointed. I realized that its like that in so many areas of life..I get my hopes all up thinking...I am so going to win...only to be disappointed by the words..."please try again." But you know what? Even though I didn't win a free DP, I do have a DP in my hand and it tastes amazing. So for now I will enjoy my Dr. Pepper and you know.....I will "try again." You see lucky for me, my father doesn't work on 1 in 6 chances but in "promises" of His word. So I can always open up His word and find more than refreshment....I find what can truely quench my thirst.

Sunny in San Fran

This past weekend, Jeff and I traveled north to the bay area to visit with the Cranks (his parents) and see Becki Porter. Becki was my roommate in Texas and now lives in Jeff's hometown. (Tell me God isn't always at work behind the scenes.)It was rainy Friday while we traveled but the rest of the weekend was beautiful. Saturday Becki and I walked around Walnut Creek Downtown area, got a pedicure(met two different christian girls in the nail shop), went to her YL office, hung out and did a whole lot of chatting and solving everyone's problems (basically the world) except our own. Then we met back up with Jeff at his parent's house and hung out in the back yard which has a back drop of a mountain, ate pork chops, strawberries and ice cream, and then sat around a fire and looked at stars. Sweet conversation and memories. Sunday we all got up and went to church. Jeff's family introduced Becki to some people and Becki is even going to housesit for them this weekend. I love it when a "god" plan comes together. It was 74 so we sat outside and soaked up the sun and had a grilled hamburger and baked beans. (Almost just like a Momma Huey burger but not the same.) All in all it was a sweet weekend with family and friends.

Jeff started his job with ej gallo today. He got up at butt crack so that he could be at the vinyard bright and early. It is 500 acres so he had to be trained on an ATV safety because he has to ride one thru the vinyard. rough huh? Anyway, I spoke briefly with him and he really enjoyed his day. He will work there two days a week and then go full time in the summer after he finishes this quarter up.

Other than that, I am still trying to connect and feel at home. It is very hard at times but if I focus on what I DO KNOW instead of all the what I DON'T KNOWS.....i realize that I am very blessed.

Booty on Pirates Cove

This past weekend I got to see a familiar face, Becki Porter. It was so nice to just "be" with someone who knows me and loves me. We had a sweet time of hanging out and exploring San Luis Obispo. Saturday, we woke up spent time with Jesus on the roof with a cup of coffee and then headed out for a walk. We walked about a mile and half to Pismo Beach. Walked along the beach and then once we got to the pier we journeyed up to the beach town of pismo. We had lunch and enjoyed the little shops and food. We even treated ourselves to carmel apples.

Sunday we went to worship and remember it was only a year ago that we were in Prague celebrating Christ there. sigh...alot has changed in this last year. Sometimes it is still hard to believe that Jeff is in my life and the love of my life. And I live in California on the beautiful central coast. Then we went on a hike with Tiona, who is a friend of Jeff's. She gave us a beautiful guided hike around Montana De Oro...near Morro Bay. Everything from mountains to sandy beach dunes with a vast veiw of untouched coastline. Breathtaking....especially for chubby kids going uphill. I will hopefully have a few picts to share soon.

Monday was a hard day...lots of tears for Melodee. So I took a personal day, and Beck and i went on our own hike just down the road from me. It is a beautiful trail manicured with flowers of all colors.....and the best part ..you are right above the ocean. The is something about the ocean waves that soothe the restless soul. God's creation speaks to me daily....I am trying to write the windows as I see them...but sometimes I just soak them in. ANYWAY...the trail wasn't that long..dead end. But there was another trail .....some might call it a "condemed" we called it adventure. We could see a secluded beach and we tried to get to it. However IF we got down..no way we could get back up...mud slid area. So we went higher and around the beach..we we found the most amazing bluffs. We climbed the rocks and sat on the edge...just talking with Jesus. Praying for each other and those we love. After a time...we decided to try out the trail that went lower....hopefully to the beach. Sure enough we got to the beach...we had to wait til the waves went out to jump to the beach. We were so excited we were there..just enjoying the little secret beach we had found. THEN becki noticed we were not alone. And the figure she saw.......she wasn't sure if he had clothes...this was a time that i am thankful i can't see distances. Sure enough he comes out from behind the rocks.....naked! huh HELLO! He spreads eagle and starts walking towards us....we turn around and begin to leave. We check..yep he is still following. You have never seen two girls jump the ocean and scurry up the mountain so quick...of course Becki left me is the dust bc i started laughing. I was like great leave me for the naked man. Later we found out that that beach is Pirate's Cove....a nude beach. Go figure. Good for a laugh I guess...but I won't be going back.....just a little scary for a naked man to be chasing after you. "Booty" on Pirates cove is NO TREASURE!