Lost Sheep

This week I have talked with and been around several new people. My heart is burdened for the great need of Christ in their lives. So many searching or just talking the BIG TALK of how life is so great....all the while you see them seeking your approval of their livestyle. They are indeed trying to find their purpose in life...like we all are...the difference is they have no direction. No shepherd in their life. Just lost sheep that don't know how to find their way home. Their fragmented stories run thru my mind and find their way to my heart. Today in church I was reminded how much the shepherd cares for his sheep. How he picks them up and places them over his shoulders in the rocky areas until we are safe again. I was also remind that we are "priests" - ones who serve God. And it is our job to share Christ and His love with them. You see....all memebers of the body are ministers. And I am still a minister in the body of Christ and forever will be....until I finally see my sweet shepherd drop his staff and run to me. Pick me up and carry me into the gates of heaven. What a sweet day that will be...sigh...but for now.....I will continue to pray and get to know them...being intentional with Christ's love.

The grass is always greener...

At least that is what four horses thought yesterday. Let me set the stage for you...Melodee arrives for her lesson and Melissa (trainer) says, "Are you comfortable going and getting the horse?" "Sure no problem. I got this." By the way, I was wearing my new boots and jeans thinking I was all kind of cute. I even had two cute long pig tails. She said the mare was with the fjords...and horses from Norway. Stocky and more docile horse. Well I went out and didn't see any horse with the Fjords...but in the pasture next to them were two horses. So I crawled thru the fence with rope in hand...just like any professional wrangler would. So one horse, who later I found out was named Rocky, came right up and was really friendly. Now I "think" mare means girl.......so I duck down and check. Weiner. Not my horse. So I go towards the other horse. Again I check. Again definately NOT a girl. Well now I'm confused. But I am NOT going back without a horse. So I decided to get the last horse. Well, Rocky (not on my rope) gets all excited and trys to get this other horse to run..whoah whoah....Melodee does not want to run. Anyway so I take the horse to the gate (which divides the two pastures) ALL the horses gather at the gate. I'm like what the heck..how am I going to get this one horse thru the gate. Well you never know unless you try. So I open the gate part way...ok now the horse are freakin out..jumpin and stuff.....lots of choas and then before I know it. The horse have totally switched pastures. They are bucking and one even stopped and rolled around and then ran the fenceline. GREAT. And one of them is running with my rope around his neck. So I go and grab him (back corner of the pasture) and try to lift his head from the new "greener grass." Well whereever this horse goes..Rocky (spawn of satan..just kidding) goes with and tries to get this horse to run. So here I am trying to say, NO to a big ol horse..who is by the way dragging me thru mud. Finally after much effort, I get the one horse out..only to meet Melissa coming down the road. (it has been at least a half hour) Yep you guess it ..not the right horse. I was suppose to get the Fjord....I didn't check them. How did I not get that I just needed the Fjord that was a mare. Communication definately would have saved me alot of trouble. We both put them back into the right pastures and I got the right horse for my lesson.

In the end, I had a good lesson and felt like I was begining to understand English a little better. No one was hurt (mainly me.) And I got to see what it was like to watch horses do a chinese firedrill. Later that day, I went back to the stables to help Jeff muck stalls. Hard work but there is something nice about simple hard labor. Felt good.

Jeff and I then went to the Palms. A very small theater..we are talking holds maybe 30 in it to see "Being Julia." We went bc Susie and Steve invited us. Funny neither of us were in the mood but we did it...and we smelled like horse. I felt bad for those around us. OH and Jeff was trying to be nice by holding open the "bathroom" door for this man.....the man just passed him by....bc you see just was holding open the door to the janitor's closet...hehehe..silly boy.

I keep seeing those horses bucking and running the fence.....even rolling in the dirt. And immediately eating the "new" grass ....makes me think about how we are..just waiting at the fence. We look over and think..man that grass sure looks good and the moment we can we bust thru the fence so excited. I wonder how long it would take for the horses to realize....the grass and pasture size was pretty much the same. I think Paul said something like, "I have learned to be content whatever the situation......." Sure it is nice to prance around a new pasture but if we aren't set there by God, eventually we will grow discontent...see the fences and the weeds. The only real JOY and peace come from Christ....not a new situation.

Hello my name is Melodee

and I am a chip aholic....I love chips, and if I don't get a job soon. I will be one big chubby bunny. The hint of lime chips are my favorite. Man oh man...they are so good. Jeff has had to ask me to "step away from the chips" several times. =)

Day 2 of Sunshine. Praise God. Yesterday Jeff and I went for walk from shell to pismo beach. Due to the fact, I live on a cliff. You walk above the ocean..too bad the freeway can drowned it out. Anyway we walked until we saw two of my favorite words, "coastal access." Yeah. So we went down to the actual beach. Beautiful...the beach ends into a big cliff. Cool huh? It was just so nice to be outside and in nature and to feel the sun again. I think we will have sun for a few days then more rain. So I plan to utilize my time and go for a walk today. Maybe even sit at the beach awhile and take in God.

No word on the job yet. So I am looking up leads and will go and check some out after my walk. I really want the job at sycamore but like i have learned in the past, I don't always know what is best for me. So I will trust God and keep stepping out. Its just feel bad bc in the back of my head...i keep thinking I NEED TO GET JOB....and then I just try to turn those anxious thoughts to prayer. You know think on the "whatevers" in life. =)

Last night, I missed 2.10. The energy, the love....and of course the students. I continue to pray for that ministry..for Mikel, for a student minister, and for the kids that make the ministry great.

I am constantly remind myself, "If God is for us, who can be against us."

Saying goodbye...

Well today was a hard day, I said "goodbye" to many of my tee shirts. Due to the fact that I live in a room, I must simplify. Over the last 5 years, I have acquired ALOT of t-shirts. So I went thru them and then Jeff went thru them (that was funny) and I tenderly put them in a bag and took them to the Goodwill. Hopefully, they will find a good home. =)

This morning, I sat at the edge of the cliff. It was butt cold but I just wanted to hear the ocean. The rain had stopped for the moment. The water was so powerful and strong as it crashed into the rocks. I just sat, closed my eyes and listened. After awhile, I just stared watching the ebb and flow of the waves. My God, my help in time of need, controls this ocean. He is in control. He loves ME! And He wants the best for me so that I might live in peace and JOY. (deep breath) God is a good contact to know....talk about network. =)

I guess that would be my prayer for you. No matter where you are, God is in control. Stop. Take time to take in the work of His hand. and Rest.

Mineral Spas and Wranglers

2.10 continually in my life. This week Jeff and I went to a small group from Calvary Church. It was a sweet time of worship and friends. But you guessed it, first thing we do is open our Bibles to Eph.2.10. Then Dennis I guy I interviewed with and did not take his job told me to trust my heart and lean not into my understanding. Proverbs 3:5-6. He also shared a word with me: DISCOVERY. That as we step out in faith we discover the life has for us.

Friday, I interviewed with Sycamore Springs. A resort, that promotes wellness and rest. They also have spring fed spas you can soak in.......which are a perk of the job. Sounds like a good job..at least a starting point. They said they will let me know by Wednesday. Another perk is that it is only minutes from were I live so that is very nice.

This week Jeff and I went to the movies with Matt and Melissa, we saw Constantine. Normally, I would not see that but it was surprisingly good. I like Melissa and Matt alot. Melissa runs the stable where Jeff works. She is fun and down to earth. Not to mention she is patient with me as I learn English horseback riding.

Last night, we drove to Paso Rablos to eat Mexican food and buy Melodee some boots to ride in. Jeff even talked me into buying wranglers...I'm still not sure about them but he thinks I look cute so...I got them. We had dinner with Tyler and Margine. Tyler is one of Jeff's best buds. It was fun to hang out them and their friends and family.

This morning, Thom O'Leary the pastor reminding me that there will always be two voices. We must choose the one we will listen to.....therefore we must know and listen to our master's voice.

Email address:

My email address is: Melodee27@hotmail.com

virtual tour of my cliff

www.classiccalifornia.com/rentals.htm

Ok I was looking on Pismo Beach website trying to figure out where the monarchs are hanging out and I saw that there was this virtual tour. I clicked on the "Dinosaur Caves" (the ocean picture) and hello that is my cliff. At the end of the video you will see a gazebo and the street behind it is Seaview ...where I live! And the bench just past the gazebo is where Jeff and I sat listening to the ocean and trying to figure out life. So go check out my neighborhood online.

real men wear speedos?

Sunday I cried so much that Jeff drove to a sporting goods store and offered to put on a speedo to make me laugh. Looking back I should have said yes ...bc sooner or later it would be funny...especially with a store full of people looking on..thinking what the heck...this girl is in tears bc her boyfriend is in a speedo. Strange but humorous. I love Jeff for being willing to make a fool of himself ot see me smile. Man oh man I wish there was Sonic in the Central Coast.

It is Tuesday night and I am at Cal Poly looking for jobs on the computer while Jeff studies. I only cried once today so I guess that is better. However I found myself looking at the 210 website and at Karen Norris dinner theatre picts instead. sigh. I keep praying for clarity or at least for the emotions to subside so I can think.

Today as it was raining...i just drove around....just thinking...i ended up at pismo's pier...where i saw a guy get out of his car tie a towel around his waist, drop his pants, and put on a wet suit.....grab his surf board and headed out to brave the cold water to catch a wave. "Don't do it Brodie....you'll never make it!", I cried from my jeep. He just keep walking. (just kidding that is a quote from Point Break)
Oops I just laughed out loud in the library ....that is frowned upon.

Ok I guess I need to be "productive"...just remember that nothing says I love you like a speedo. haha

seaview and morning coffee

I don't think my body has adjusted to california time bc I woke up at 6:51 am this morning...of course i did not get out of bed til 8. I proceed to make coffee. And make my way to the balcony..a flat ontop of the roof. Among the rooftops, I was still as I watched the fog roll over the mountains out to the sea. It was overcast, but the sun was breaking thru with rays of sunshine. I just can't seem to take it all in.....the awe of nature..the wonder that I am here in California. I am in love and I have a beautiful place to live. -deep breath- Now it is at the end of a long day....and I need to remember how my morning started. A sweet time: Jesus, coffee, beautiful view and a dog named, Blue.

Today was a teary day....for no reason other than I don't know "what I want to be" ..which is stupid bc a job doesn't define you. (Notice I am reminding myself) I drove to Inn at Morro Bay for an interview. Beautiful drive within the mountains. Long story short....pretty sure I have the job....so if we are counting ..that is two interviews...two job possibilities. Thing is neither pay that great...sigh...and then i rethink my thoughts on just wanting a silly job...maybe you can't do that here..maybe I'm too old for that. sigh...I have another connection..after that..I need to make a decision or go another route. Today i hate that i don't have a "vision"...well at least a career vision...and I hate that I can't seem to make a decision....and I hate that I cry. Stupid. =) Oh well.....we all knew it would happen..a day of tears.

Sweet Jeff reminded me of what is true and that everything will be ok.....and gave lots of hugs. Took me to Margie's Diner for a hamburger and Dr.Pepper. We ran some errands and then decided to go to a movie, Hitch. Laughter really is the best medicine. Great movie.Good company...and a strange man to my right making very loud strange noises....help take your mind from the mess of the reality.

I am reminded of what I read yesterday, how we must "take our thoughts captive"...fixing our thoughts and mind on Christ. We starve our minds of Christ and His Word...then we become malnourished in our lives and our love.......which definately reflects our attitudes and actions.I look forward to worship tomorrow. Jeff and I will attend Mountain Brook.I anticipate a sweet time connecting to Christ.

As for now, I will remember this morning when the world was quite and beautiful.....and all was good. (Bc there is a watch dog on the roof=)

a walk to the beach

Last night Jeff and I had diner with Susie (my new housemate) and her boyfriend Steve....we met at my new home. I will live in Shell beach and yes if I walk down the block I am at the Pacific. Susie is wonderful and very gregarious and Steve adores her. It was fun to share our stories. We spent about 5 hours just visiting..we also walked to Dell's pizzeria to eat. No car needed.

The house is very cute and you can go to the top of the house ..where there is a flat....balcony...you can't hear the ocean..but you can see it. And another fun thing, her dog, Blue (named for his eyes) walks on the roof. I crap you not ...when we came home the dog greets us from the roof..I gotta get a picture of that. She said it is funny bc those that don't know them ...come knocking on the door..."did you know you have a dog on the roof?" I will have a my own room and bathroom and she is very cool about the use of the rest of the house. She even has a hot tub....broken right now but will soon be working.

Steve and Susie are very well traveled and have lived in the area for a long time. Already Steve has given me several leads on jobs and also adviced Jeff with Vineyards to check out. They are fun and have great stories. They are checking into moving to Mexico...just past Baha CAlifornia..how cool is that? Pray for Susie, she has Type one Diabetes and is in need of a new pancrease. I think part of the reason for a housemate....(for Steve) is to have someone in the home with her....just in case. Not that you would ever know anything was wrong with her..she is a spitfire and definately an entertainer.

God is good. I couldn't have asked for a a better location or person to live with. What is fun is that this is the one call I made for a home. I say this knowing that just as God provided a home ..he will also provide a job that I can enjoy, be good at, and have enough pay and benefits. He promised to lead me and work out the details..ps. 37:23.

Jeff is hard at work in school. Defining your thesis is quite the task. But he is a hard worker and I know will ace this master's school thing and find a job that makes him come alive inside.

Other than that...in my spare time. I look for jobs, get coffee, and sit with Jesus on the beach. It still amazes me that my friend, my love....controls the waves. Cool huh?

OH one more thing....I was at the gas station and this scooby doo van pulled up and all these hippie guys pile out...trying to get to san fran..wanted money...i didn't have cash but i asked them where they were from....yada yada....it is so fun to here their stories. I guess that is the most fun part of the journey..everyone has a story to tell....and I love to listen..share mine and hopefully...tell "the greatest love story of all....the story of christ."

I am learning to have faith believing...."mind over matter" ..not doubting that God will direct my steps and open amazing doors for Jeff and I. After all, his thoughts of me are greater than the grains of sand........stink have you seen how much sand is out there....man oh man...my jesus "loves me."

sunsets and horses

Sunday was one of the hardest and best days in my life. As I said "goodbye" to so many I loved, my heart ached....and my eyes leaked. I boarded my plane at 2.10, trusting in what God has based so much of my ministry on....ephesians 2.10. That he has plans for me...and this is apart of that plan..to leave the safe and loving place of First Lewisville...and go to a new and unknown place. Lucky for me that unknown place is absolutely beautiful and holds the love of my life. Jeffrey Michael Crank. =)

Ok even on the plane..God reminded me of 2.10..i sat next to JC a young man from Venezula. He was returning to california after spending his birthday with his family. He is in the middle of a divorce and wondering what life held. Who he was? We visited...and share our thoughts on family and marriage. I was totally able to share that God is a good God..and has good plans for him. To keep trusting in a loving father. Oh did i mention that this whole conversation started bc i asked him what time is was? And yep you guess it...the time was 2.10 california time. flippin sweet.

Fast fwd to San Luis Obispo..where Jeff was waiting with a balloon and a single rose. He said it was a strong bud...that was just waiting to bloom...like our love. IT WAS SO GOOD TO SEE HIM AND TO BE IN HIS ARMS AGAIN. That evening we went and sat up on a cliff and listened to the ocean.........watching the sun set...in awe that I was here in california and that God had brought us together. I shared my weekend with him and we even read some notes of mine together.

Monday, I had an interview. Great job. Not so great pay. They offered it to me...I am to get back to them by the end of the week. Susie Fulton, the lady I rent a room from.....said that the Morro Bay Inn is hiring...so i am praying about that. I know God will work in this..but job/money/insurance are the things that worry me a bit. However, I just keep thinking about not being a "wave tossed in the sea" .......so i just try and trust and seek the father who loves me for advice.

Then Monday afternoon Jeff had a surprise for me. He has been working a job......I thought was in a coffee shop.........nope..he has been working in a stable cleaning and feeding horses..so that i could have riding lessons. I LOVE THIS MAN! I had my first english riding lesson monday...i am still sore. The little ranch is nestled at the bottom of the mountains...which are a beautiful green right now. After my lesson, we sweep the stable and fed the horses......together. Beautiful! God is good and He continues to amaze me with his goodness.